


I Promised Myself

by raineavon



Category: Pinky and the Brain
Genre: An explosion happens offscreen, Blood and Injury, Brain is having a bit of a panic attack/existential crisis here, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friends and QPR partners can kiss and say I love you, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Very New to this fandom, Intended as romantic but interpret however you like, Just a cut a scrape and a bruise, M/M, Mild Blood, My First Work in This Fandom, Pinky is being a sweetheart as usual, There's some fire as well, actually, friends should kiss/cuddle more often, no beta we die like men, nothing too bad or graphic, off topic but whatever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:33:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28834212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raineavon/pseuds/raineavon
Summary: Brain's suffered one too many failures, and it's taking its toll. Pinky just wants the best for his partner.
Relationships: Brain/Pinky (Pinky and the Brain)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 69





	I Promised Myself

**Author's Note:**

> I had the worst writer's block, so I looked for writing prompts. One of them was, "Write a story about a character feeling powerless." And then this happened. Also, because I don't like having characters do out of character-ish things without explanation, my personal HC for these two swearing is that Brain only swears when he's intensely frustrated (mostly with himself) and Pinky only swears when he's very concerned (usually for Brain). So that's why Pinky swears a little in here.

The Brain pushed himself to his feet, grimacing at the feeling of what he was sure would soon become a very large scar. He stumbled forward and leaned against a nearby wall, grateful for its added support. He turned his eyes to the sky, both relieved and horrified to see an apparently unharmed Pinky falling to the earth, along with the burning remnants of the night’s ill-fated plan. The taller mouse hit the ground a few feet away and bounced like a skipping stone before coming to a halt at Brain’s side. 

Upon further inspection, unharmed might not have been the most accurate way to describe Pinky’s current state. He had a fairly sizable scrape on his shoulder, seeping blood beginning to mar his snowy fur. There were a few chunks missing from his ears and the beginnings of a bruise just under his eye. Brain shuddered, distracted from his own pain by the prospect of whatever had caused that bruise having hit just a millimeter or two farther up. Pinky, on the other hand, didn’t seem to notice his injuries, eyes focused solely on the growing bloom of red on the Brain’s side. He opened his mouth briefly, but decided against whatever he was about to say, opting instead to scoop up his friend and make a start for the lab.

Brain didn’t have the will to protest, nor did he have the presence of mind to do much more than lay limply in his cagemate’s arms and stare at the carnage behind them. Shrapnel from the explosion was strewn about the street, a fire raged in the abandoned building they’d been working out of, and a charred piece of paper that had been the machine’s blueprint had lighted on a parking meter, its blackened edges trying to catch again, embers fighting their final curtain. And the Brain’s mind whirled viscously, images of the fallout had someone been around flashing in vivid detail before his eyes, the smell of burning flesh almost palpable. It could have gone so wrong. Correction: it could have gone so much  _ more _ wrong. 

Brain ran through every calculation he could think of, desperately trying to discern what had happened, where he had failed. There was no reason, no logical reason his machine shouldn’t have worked. He’d been so careful. He’d been so  _ sure _ . He’d _ known _ it would work. It  _ should _ have worked. So why, _ why _ was he now hanging worthlessly in his partner’s hold? Why was he fighting so hard just to stay conscious? Why wasn’t he ruling the world yet? Why was he so damn  _ useless _ ? 

He felt so small. So  _ powerless _ . No matter how hard he tried, _ nothing _ was ever in his control.  _ Nothing _ ever went according to plan.  _ Nothing _ he did ever,  _ ever _ worked. Nothing ever changed. Nothing ever got better. He’d been trying for more than  _ twenty years _ to take over the world, but he never even got  _ close _ . And the few times he  _ did _ , he’d given it up. How was he supposed to make _ anything _ better if couldn’t even pull off one simple plan? What were his efforts even worth? In all his years, what had he done for  _ anyone? _ Dot had won cartoons the vote with a  _ song _ , and she was a  _ child _ . Brain had never even made a  _ dent _ in the toon civil rights department. He was outmatched by a  _ little girl _ . What was the  _ point _ ? Why did he even bother trying?

“Now, this might sting a little.” Pinky’s voice startled him from his thoughts. When had they gotten back to the lab? And when had Pinky brought the first aid kit? He watched numbly as Pinky gently cleaned his wound, not sure if his own pained groans were real or imagined. The lanky lab-mouse pulled back to inspect his work before standing up to retrieve the gauze. Brain caught sight of Pinky’s shoulder again, startled by the dried blood matting his fur down. Brain stood shakily just as as his mate returned with the roll of bandages. He caught the Brain as he faltered on his wobbly legs, “Poit. No, no, Brain. I can do it just fine while you’re sitting. No use straining on my account- Narf.” He softly sat Brain back on matchbox he’d been using as an operating table.

“You’re shoulder,” Brain protested, his cotton-filled mouth making it sound much smaller than he wanted it to. He tried to shuffle his way closer to the bottle of antiseptic, “I need to clean your shoulder.” 

Pinky tenderly took his hand and placed it over his own chest. “Oh, don’t worry about that, Brain. I’ll be fine; it’s just a scrape anyway,” he started unwrapping a length of gauze, “And you’re more than welcome to help me with it after you’re all patched up! Zort!”

Brain curled his fingers into his partner’s fur, “No. Y- you don’t understand. I  _ need _ to clean it for you. I can’t… you’re hurt.”

Pinky raised a brow at him while he began wrapping the bandage around his middle. “Well so are you. And you’re a lot more hurt than I am. Just let me- poit?” he broke off, concern flooding his face at the sound Brain’s sniffling. He swallowed, looking quickly back down at his work. “What’s wrong, Brain? It’s not too tight, is it?” 

Brain shook his head, doing his best to choke back the tears. “No, Pinky, you’re fine. The bandages are fine. I… I’m just so  _ worthless. _ I-i can’t do anything right, I can’t even keep you from getting hurt I-'' he was cut off by his own sob, floodgates opening fully with the confession. He let his head fall forward and cried into Pinky’s coat, arms braced on his hips, tugging his friend closer.

Pinky hurriedly finished off the bandage and sat down on the matchbox, pulling Brain into his lap. He laid his chin on his partner’s head and started rubbing his back. “Shh, sh sh shush. None of that. You’re nothing even close to worthless. How could you be? You are the Brain, after all, narf.”

Brain clung to Pinky, the taller’s soothing almost making him feel  _ worse _ , even as he reveled in the touch. He sobbed, “I’ve never done anything worthwhile. I’ve never helped  _ anyone _ . I’ve never fixed  _ anything _ . I promised myself. I promised myself I’d never be this powerless again, but I never stopped being powerless in the first place. Nothing has  _ ever _ been in my control.” His breath hitched, effectively ending the inevitable spiral of misery he was about to drag Pinky down.

“Hush. You’ve helped loads of people, Brain! Just because we haven’t taken over the world yet, doesn’t mean you haven’t done anything for it. And even if you hadn’t, well then you’d just be overdo- Troz,” he pulled back to look into Brain’s eyes, offering him a reassuring smile.

“If we had died today, do you think anyone would have cared?” He looked down as soon as he said it, vainly trying to will the question out of reality and back into his head where it could only hurt him.

Pinky just stared at him for a moment before lifting him up to look into his eyes. “It doesn’t matter,” he said firmly, “It doesn’t matter if anyone cared but us… But me.” Brain bit his lip, staring dumbly into the other’s face. Pinky rubbed their noses together and continued, “I’m not going to pretend I know how you feel; I don’t. But I do know this: you are the most important person in my life, and I’ll be damned if you don’t know it.”

“Pinky I-” Brain started, a little stunned.

Pinky swiftly cut him off, “No, let me finish. I don’t  _ care _ if you change the world, I don’t  _ care _ if anyone remembers us. I care that you were ever willing to _ try _ . I care that you  _ want  _ things to be better. I care about  _ you _ . Even if this is all we do for the rest of our lives, just keep on with plan after plan after plan, that would be enough. Or even if we stopped, if tonight were the last try, that’d be okay, too. Because we  _ tried _ .  _ You tried _ . And that’s a hell of a lot more than most people can say. I… I just want you to be  _ happy _ , Brain. That’s all that I’ve ever wanted.”

There were tears gathered at the corners of sky-colored eyes. Brain floundered for his words for a moment, then settled for placing a soft kiss on Pinky’s lips. He let his face rest in the crook of Pinky’s neck and sighed. “I- Thank you, Pinky, but... I don’t think that would be enough for me.”

“P-poit… Then what would, Brain?”

Brain buried his face in Pinky’s fur, “I don’t know.”

Pinky nuzzled the back of Brain’s head as best he could. “Then… I guess we’ll just have to figure it out together, won’t we?” 

Brain chuckled a little, “I suppose you’re right, Pinky. I suppose you’re right…” His hand drifted to Pinky’s bloody shoulder, “Letting me help you with this would be a good start.”

His cagemate laughed, “Narf! Alright, go ahead then.” He set the Brain down and placed a quick peck on the top of his head.

Brain went straight to work on his friend’s shoulder, humming lightly when it was sufficiently clean. He cut off a bandage and started winding it around the small wound. Pinky sighed dreamily as he watched him, “I love you, Brain.”

Brain only hesitated for a moment before replying, “I love you, too, Pinky.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. If you have any suggestions for how I could better write for these two, please tell me. I'm not currently in a place where I can actually watch the show and the last time I watched a full episode was when I was too young to remember so... I really love these characters though and they bring me so much joy, so I really want to do them justice.


End file.
